How to start making your dreams come true.
Isn’t it funny that I run a non-profit organization called “Dare to Dream” that aims to inspire girls in disadvantaged communities throughout Africa to realise their dreams, yet one of the scariest steps I’ve ever had to take is saying “Yes!” to my own dream to become independent and start Thrive Now.
We all have dreams that scare us. You know that dream that you dream secretly? The one you only tell your partner or best friend about, shyly, when you’re on holiday after the second glass of wine? That’s the one. That big dream. The one you’re telling yourself is “too big for me”. The one of which you think “I can’t do that!”.
It makes me think of a beautiful quote:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate . Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It’s our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually who are we not to be? “ — Marianne Williamson
There’s a lot of truth in that quote. It sure applies to my little voice that keeps telling me “you can’t”.
Here’s the bad news and the good news: we all have that little voice. And there are ways we can silence that voice. That’s actually what coaching helps people do: overcome the little voice of fear in their heads!
Here are four important steps you can take to start you toward realizing your dream:
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Declare it.
What is your ONE. BIG. DREAM.? Say it out loud. Write it down. Tell someone who matters to you. For several years, I had a dream that I did not even dare to declare to myself, let alone to anybody else. The biggest step I took was saying out loud – to myself and to others: “I want to be a mentor-coach. I want to create and hold space for magic to happen in people and organizations.”
(Tip: make a vision board to help you visualize and focus on your dream.) -
Acknowledge your fear.
Having fear about big, important decisions is natural. Don’t push it away. Don’t minimize it. Look it straight in the eye and engage it. Say: I see you. I won’t do anything stupid. One of the most valuable lessons Alan Seale taught me is this: ask your fear “What do you need from me in order to be able to take the next small step on this journey?”. Try it. You may be surprised to find that your fear is ok with you taking small steps toward your dream! Which brings me to the second most important point:
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Take small steps.
I cannot repeat it enough: when you’re wanting to pursue a life goal, start with small steps. Start by doing something that you know you can do. Something you know you can succeed at right now. I took the first step of founding Thrive in 2016 when I enrolled for a 3-day course to get clear on my soul mission. I was still employed full time. It was a ‘no-risk’ first step. All I had to do was take three days holiday and pay for my course. Small steps. And once you’ve completed the first small step, take the next small step. And so it continues.
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Enjoy the process. (And don’t rush it.)
This was one of my biggest personal learnings: don’t rush the process. Don’t wish you were already further. That’s when you miss the beauty of where you are today. In 2016 I made this commitment to myself, which hangs on a post-it note on my bathroom mirror: “I will give my dream the space and time it needs to grow.”Pursuing your dream is a unique journey that deserves its own time and space. Why not enjoy every step instead of rushing toward the goal? It is still something I remind myself of every day.
You’ve got to start somewhere. Why not start today by answering these two questions:
- What passion project have you been putting off?
- What tiny action can you take today that will get you one step closer?
If you’d like help on getting your dreams and goals clear, or you want to make a personal vision board or find out what the next step is you can take, feel free to contact me. We can set up a few coaching sessions to get you going!